There’s been a direct correlation between Twitter’s increasing popularity and my frustration at having a common name.
You may or may not be aware that there is a basketball player also named JR Smith. He plays for the Denver Nuggets. I changed my site several years ago into a Geocities-style fan site for this guy, as an April Fool’s joke.
Over the last week or two, I’ve been getting an increasing number of mentions on Twitter from people thinking that I’m that guy. It was amusing at first, but now it’s just fucking irritating.
I’ve decided to chronicle those cases here, for prosperityposterity.
It started off innocently enough:
@DaLeynaRae – Way to go Denver!!! Great game @jrsmith!
And some of these people seemed to have useful or positive things to say:
@WallerCo – @jrsmith….where are u? U know the conference finals started tonight right?
@ShadCharleston – Lol , Ok @Jrsmith ! ..can’t even hate on you for gettin’ that Tech! Good shot boy ..But still Lakers gonna Pull it off!
@jtenkely – Huge! 3 from @jrsmith at the end of the third… But you gotta watch your mouth or you give ‘em back.
@Johnytheanomaly – @JRSmith please duff #Kobe tonight
@dquarles5 – LOL @jrsmith slow mo replay of him cursin da whole dam stadium out!
Then it became evident that JR Smith is not well-liked:
@ShadCharleston – Seems like @jrsmith gets more playing time than Jones ..even though Jones starts.
@Wizdom80 – lol @JRSmith what a sissy…@nate_robinson would sock him all over again
@ShadCharleston – Ga dammit @jrsmith!!
@dnldidit – @lakersnation he smoke weed look @ his lips. Lmao @jrsmith
@D_AMAZIN – i think jr smith has a twitter.wel if he does @jrsmith i wanna see u do that goofy ass strut game 5 in la u fuckin clown!!!lmao
And, of course, the Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory came into play:
@MdotPORTER – @jrsmith shoot urself in the head! Thanks
Honestly, how difficult is it to click the link that forms when you mention me and see that I am indeed fat, white and not in a nationally-televised basketball game? Even if the picture on my profile didn’t give it away, maybe the fact that I’m checking in at a mexican restaurant on Britekite while you’re watching “me” on live TV might be a clue.
Morons.