Dad called this morning and said he was diagnosed with severe chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.
I’m sad for him. I’m angry at him. I’m angry at myself.
I’m sad for him because he’s staring death right in the face. I don’t believe in an afterlife. When he’s gone, he’s gone forever.
I’m angry at him because this is entirely his own fault. I’ve begged him for years to stop smoking. He always dismissed me. I knew this was going to fucking happen.
I’m angry at myself for all of the wasted time.
I’ve read that if he stops smoking and they’re able to clear some of the obstructions then he has a good chance for survival, but is he doesn’t stop smoking…
Anyone who knows my dad will know how unlikely that is.
I’m digging up hypnotherapists for him to help him quit. Hopefully, this is enough of a wake-up call that he’ll take it seriously.